Help! It’s Time For Pocket Money.
Our oldest is 9 years old, and up until now we haven’t ‘done’ pocket money.
Photo by Flickr User wwarby
The kids haven’t really needed it; they often ask for things when we are out and about, and sometimes we say yes, but often we say no. We avoid a lot of crap coming into the house this way; if they have their own money I can see the flood gates opening!
We have nothing against pocket money; we have no doubt it’s a very good thing for children to have some money of their own. It’s just that every time the kids have asked us about it, we’ve never been able to come to a decision on the spot. Then it gets forgotten about until next time the topic is raised.
But now, I feel like we need to introduce the concept into our household. DD1 is, without a doubt, the only child in her class not to get a weekly allowance, and DD2, in Year 3, is one of only a few.
So we’ve decided to say yes to pocket money but it turns out that’s the easy bit of the decision.
It’s the details that are tricky. Details such as:
How much?
Do we give them all the same amount or do the older ones get more? Do we base the amount on their age ( ie 10p per year of age?)? How often do we increase it?
Where do they keep it?
Do we hold onto it for them or do they put it in their piggy banks? Aren’t piggy banks for saving? They could put it in their purses but the chances of them losing these are quite high in this house!
Do we let them spend it on what ever they want?
Or do we ‘have a say’ about what they buy with it? Do we make them save some? Or do we rule that if they want sweets or magazines, then they ‘have’ to use their pocket money?
And finally, what do they have to do for their money?
Should we treat it like a salary in that they are expected to do stuff around the house to ‘earn’ it? Will they lose part of it for bad behaviour or refusal to be helpful? Can they earn more by doing extra jobs?
We really need some advice on this one and would appreciate any replies to this post, letting me know how it works in your house.
The kids are 9, 7, 5 and 3 years old. The 3 year old wouldn’t know a pound coin if it bit him on the bum, so is there any point in giving him pocket money until he’s older?
And if your children aren’t old enough to get pocket money, then how did your parents work it when you were a child? Will you use the same system for your own children?
Help!
well we tied it into school attendance, so it started for child one when she started school. It was £1 a week for two years, then when child two started, he got £1 a week, and she went up to £1.50.
Mine tend to save it. We did originally tie it into chores but pretty much gave up on organising that. It was a 50p given, 50p earned by 5 chores deal. Too much hassle to police.
They occasionally get mags in addition to this – but that tends to be birthday/xmas presents (subscriptions). Any sweets they want have to be bought out of their pocket money. We put a block on ALL of their pocket money going on sweets.
Eldest also gets ‘snack money’ for snack time at school – which are healthy options such as toast or fruit smoothies – or she can take snacks from home.
First friday of each month – they have chosen (with a little parental nudge) to sponsor a child in Africa, and a tiger, so donate their pocket money towards that.
They have a piggy bank in their rooms, and can decant into purses if they want to take money with them when we go out. If they want something when we’re out – we can sub them the money and they can pay us back.
when we’ve done a car boot of their toys – they’ve had the money from that too.
I find it cuts down dramatically on the ‘but I WANNNTTT that’ when I simply say ‘sure, but it’s out of your money’. Somehow the plastic tat loses its allure – and likewise, it bothers them more if they lose or break something they’ve actually paid for themselves.
We started R on pocket money when she turned 5.
She gets £1 a week for each chore she completes.
That’s often no chores =£0.00p.
If she puts her clean clothes in her wardrobe that’s £1.
If she unloads the dishwasher that’s £1.
Most weeks she gets £1; but if, as now she’s saving for something, then she might get her chores done and get £2.
We introduced it so she would understand the value of money and would be able to influence her own purchases. We have talked and guided her about what to get with her money and after a few months she realised she’d prefer to save for special things. So she knows a bear factory visit takes 2 months and a Sylvanian family about the same.
It works well for us and her teachers are astounded by her knowledge and understanding of money.
Hth
No pocket money here yet, however have tried to bribe her to do various things – she’s not interested in money. When I was young I got enough to buy a few sweets each week and from when I was 13 I worked as a babysitter to earn extra. I’ll be reading your replies with interest.
We have started doing pocket money a few times with A and R. The only requirement to earn $2 per week is that they keep their rooms tidy (if I want them to help me with something then they should just do it, not because they are paid. That said, I don’t ask much of them at all, they have their whole lives to do chores! I am just talking about ‘Can you put this in the garage for me/feed the dog/tidy the shoes by the front door so no-one kills themselves getting in the house’ type jobs. Thankfully, they are messy little buggers and we rarely have to stump up the cash! We also have this as an excuse if they want to buy some tat ‘Ah well, if only you had titdied your bedroom you would have the money to buy it!’ Mwah, ha ha! I am nasty, aren’t I?!!
The Minis are too young but when I was growing up, it was chores. And for big things. Like school trips. My parents would go halfsies with me. Also for luxuries like a new Shaun Cassidy album (shudder). LIttle things like gum and treats were tied to behaviour at the moment. There is no right here. You are trying to teach the value of money, of hard work, of earning something and about luxuries versus necessities. Start from there and you’ll figure it out. x
We have been struggling with this too. Do let us know what you end up doing.
We’ve been grappling with just this question! And we have two boys age 9 and 6. Some suggestions:
* Think of this as you transferring control of money that you have spent on them anyway over to them. Decide what the allowance should cover and then come up with an amount which will allow your children to buy those things or decide to hold off buying them so they can save for something bigger. They should have enough money to feel like they can buy things but not so much that they don’t have to make trade offs in their purchasing decisions.
* Have them keep some of it in their purses. If they lose it, that’s a tough lesson learned but it will mean they will be more careful with their money in the future. Keep the rest for them in either a savings account or the Bank of Mum and Dad.
I’ve written about this in two posts:
5 Ways Kids Allowances Fail – And How To Avoid Them: http://www.growingrichkids.com/5-ways-kids-allowances-can-fail-and-how-to-avoid-them
The 5% Difference To Kids Allowances That Delivers Powerful Lessons: http://www.growingrichkids.com/the-5-difference-to-kids-allowances-that-delivers-powerful-lessons
The 3 year old is a little young but you can start teaching about different coins and notes. Sounds like you are already well on the way of the power of No and teaching them that they can’t have everything they think they want!
Look forward to seeing what you figure out!
Suzanne
There are some very good ideas in both of those links. Thank you for sharing them.
I blogged about this a little while ago and got some really good comments – you can have a look here if you want to
http://www.frugalfamily.co.uk/2010/10/pocketmoney-how-much.html
Good luck with whatever you decide x
I wrote a piece for Real Parenting which you might like to take a look at
http://www.realparenting.co.uk/wordpress/04/12/starting-pocket-money-with-your-child/
The chores thing is a good idea. As a child, I was never made to do chores and always given things without merit, and it took my until I was into my 20s to realise that I have to do all these things for myself.